First, my mom and I went "whale watching". Now, on the brochure of this "whale watching" is a huge whale doing a backflip with its tail sticking out of the water. Then on the inside of the brochure, it has this cute picture of a whale. Seems promising right? The brochure also goes on to mention something about other wildlife and something about a lobster demonstration and bird feeding and blah blah blah but OMG IT'S WHALE WATCHING!!! So I was pretty pumped. We hop on the boat (see Facebook pictures) and head down the bay, past Georges Island and McNabb island (no relation to Donovan McNabb, promise) and go into the nice, bright, ocean waters of the Atlantic. It's FREEZING and we see the occasional seabird, and I think I see splashes in the water of some sort of oceanic wildlife creature, but alas, nothing emerges from the water. Along the way, the tour guide (whose voice...*shudder* think Fran Drescher meets high pitched girly girl) pulls a (legal) lobster trap out of the water and promptly begins fondling the thing. Her first mate (some lanky white dude) bands its claws so it doesn't try to snap at her, and she continues talking about how to determine whether or not the lobster is male or female. She pulls out this pointy thing from its torso and says "SEE?! IT'S A MISTER LOBSTER!" and the poor thing just sits there and takes it.
The rest of the whale watching trip was relaxing and nice, but as the boat turns around, it dawns on me that no one on this boat has seen any type of exotic wildlife. NO. WHALES. I mean, it was okay since it was a beautiful day out and it was really relaxing, so I wasn't that pissed, but I mean...there were NO WHALES. Or seals. Or any other animal that they talked about.
But on the way back to dock, the little girls (wearing booty shorts...[pause] these girls are around 8 and it is FREEZING up here, wtf moms) throw bread pieces (idk where they got the bread from) and start throwing them up in the air, to which the seagulls swarm down to the boat and swoop up the food and circle the boat before repeating the same action. It was kinda scary but I got some good pics out of it so all was good.
The rest of the day was filled with walking around yada yada yada but then, after the sun set, Mom and I go to the nearest bar/pub/restaurant without a cover charge and sit at the bar. I order a Stella and my mom orders some of the Pale Ale on tap. Luckily, we didn't have to pay the $5 cover charge, cuz this singer/band playing SUCKED. Okay, maybe that's a little harsh but hear me out. First of all, this woman singer lady is in her mid-50s I'd say, dyed blonde hair, and looks like everyone's Aunt Peggy. She just LOOKS like an aunt. Then, once I make it past her face, she's wearing a leopard dress, stopping mid-thigh. [gag] And stealing a line from Sex and the City 2 I'm like, "Isn't that dress a little young for her?" I'm not one to judge older ladies trynna do their thang, but...seriously. I was confused. Especially since the rest of her band looked like grandpas trynna stay hip. I'm expecting her to do some jazz or Enya or some shit, but she starts singing STEVIE WONDER and SMOKEY ROBINSON. [forreal pause] I look at my mom and I'm like WHAAAT THE EFF. I was so turned off. She gravels her voice and lowers her octave, and I'm just....confused, and hating it. Sort of offended too. I mean, her voice was okay for a Canadian white lady, but there was just no way her voice/performing style would do Stevie and Smokey any justice.
Good thing the Argentina vs. Nigeria game was on. I'm not a soccer follower, we all know that. But, I was glued to the bar TV that night. GO ARGENTINA!
And there were no black people or any sort of minorities in this place, so needless to say, I was real uncomfortable. But my beer was good so everything sort of evened out.
Moral of the Day: Whales and black people are rarities up in this place. :(
No comments:
Post a Comment